Category Archives: commitment

happy, healthy, then weight loss maybe

  • I lose my breath going up stairs. This so totally sucks at work.
  • A 3 mile #walkathome feels harder to do now than many moons ago when I was regularly walking with Leslie. I am not kicking or knee-lifting as high. And what leslie calls hamstring curls absolutely kill my left hip/upper thigh region.
  • My joints are achy and tight. My ankle (yes, the surgeried one) is super tight. I feel like I am 100 years old when I get out of bed or when I walk around after sitting for any period of time.
  • my lower back aches when I do just about anything.
  • I am tired a lot of the time. I definitely do best with 8+ hours of sleep but even then I am still tired.
  • my gremlin acts up often and is dull and achy almost every day.
  • I am still itchy. Not as intense and not all the time, but I definitely am still itchy. When I stay wheat free I am less itchy but I have yet to achieve no itchy. I may need to try dairy free or maybe a round of whole30.
  • I miss my flexibility. It has been a very long time since I have been able to do a full split but I want to get that back. More than the splits, I want to move my body more fluidly and comfortably.
  • I miss feeling strong.  My chiroractor made me stop heavy lifting squats because of neck issues. I stopped almost all lifting, gave up my gym membership, blahblahbla and it has been a very long time since I have pushed my muscles to lift something heavy. I miss it.

So here’s the deal.

I need to lose some weight. I have gained back everything and then some and none of my clothes fit. All the healthy numbers we worry about as we get older (cholesterol, blood pressure, etc.) are great. I will not kid myself. I know I am lucky to be 36 years old and almost a hundred pounds overweight with excellent cholesterol and blood pressure and no problems with diabetes. That being said, I still need to lose weight. It is what it is.

But here’s the thing. I don’t want losing weight to consume me. I did that before. I was super Weight Watcher. I know there are people who can follow WW and not be a freak about it, but not me. I turned into one of those freaky dieters and I didn’t like it. I don’t want to go back to that place. I don’t want to restrict and deprive. 1200, 14, or even 1600 calories may be what “they” would quote me but believe you me, you don’t want to see  me on so few calories. Hangry Jen, ideed.

I want to eat healthy. I want to eat delicious. Food is not the enemy. I have come to love preparing and cooking food. I have come a long way in my cooking and I am sure I make and eat way too much of the sweet, rich, heavy foods  that are meant to be treats not every day consumption. I love the time I spend in the kitchen. I do not want food to be the enemy.

I don’t want to actually focus on weight loss. I don’t want to will NOT be a slave to the scale.

Weight loss will be the happy accident of the changes I am working towards.

A couple of six months ago, I changed my handles from @mendingjen to @jengoeszen. I was starting to focus more on yoga and finding some sort of peace. I think it was sort of me faking it until I make it. But I never got around to the making it part. I sort of let my funk and health issue seep into my head…my self & body image have been pretty much in  the toilet. All leading to less and less yoga.

Go figure, I try to adjust myself to lean on yoga more and I lean on yoga LESS.

I NEED more yoga and meditation in my life. I feel better when I sneak in some yoga each day. And there is no denying when I add in a few minutes of meditation every day, I find it easier to deal with stressful situations. I can find my breath easier. I rely on my breathing to work out the kinks of stress. When I use my yoga and meditation I feel good.

I also feel good when I squeeze in some walking. When I feel good, I walk more often and just in general accumulate more steps each day.

When I walk I feel good. When I feel good, I want to walk more. When I yoga, I feel good. When I feel good, I yoga more. When I walk and yoga more, I want to walk and yoga more. When I walk and yoga more, I feel better. My body feels good to move and my head feels good. I want to move more. I want to eat better.

When I am not active, it is so much easier to eat junk food. Or wheat. When I am moving and grooving regularly, I want to eat better. It just happens naturally.

I will work on small, daily habits that will keep me active and feeling good about myself. I think that is the key for any sort of lasting weight loss healthy habits. Healthy habits will go a long way to keeping me happy. At least, its a start.

My life is not perfect but it is good.

Happy is not hard for me….but happy AND healthy, that is going to be the KEY.



Healthy habits I want to work on this week: 10K steps each and every day AND 64 oz of water each and every day.

What healthy habits are you working on this week?


Hugs & Much Love,

Jennifer Lynn


menu plan monday


It has been a while since I posted my menu plans. I have been making them every week but not posting them…silly me.

So, here ya go!


Monday: Man-pleasing chicken, cauliflower & broccoli, mashed potatoes

Tuesday: Sausage stuffed pepper casserole, big salad

Wednesday: Spaghetti (Zoodles) and Meat sauce, grilled chicken & leftover salad

Thursday: Grilled Chicken Caesar Salad, Beef Nachos

Friday: Anniversary Date-night at Home! Prime Rib, twice baked potatoes, braised radishes. Pink wine or champagne and a gluten free cake from local bakery!!

Saturday: Polynesian-style Wild Boar, Fried Rice

Sunday: Chicken Cutlets.


What’s on your dinner menu this week?

march goaling





I have a love/hate relationship with goals. I set them and then seem to sabotage myself. I don’t set goals saying I will wing it….and I sabotage myself. Last night I sat in my chair with a blank notepad and a sharpie pen. I wrote down what I want to do with this month. I want to walk more, yoga more, strength train more, blog more. I want less stress and less harshness….mostly the stress and harshness I bring on myself. I want less of the ALL or Nothing that I am usually so good with doing.

Last night I sat with my notepad and my pen and wrote out the thing I want to accomplish this month. And since yesterday was a snow day and the weekend was a bust, I am stating my moth for goal setting purposes starts March 4th and ends March 30th. This is a total of 28 days.

In these 28 days, I want and will do:

  • daily yoga pose – I have chosen a super easy pose but one that will allow me to sit in the pose and do some daily soul-searching or meditation. I have chosen Reclined Bound Angle pose and I will do this every day, either first thing in the morning or before bed on days I don’t do any other yoga practice. Oh yeah, there will probably be no pictures of this…it isn’t about seeding a difference after 28 days, it IS about feeling a difference.
  • sign up for and attend YIN yoga every week. As a birthday gift from my homegirls, Heather and Deb, I am signing up for an 8-week YIN yoga class
  • Attend ONE free yoga class at the Hindu temple
  • #walkathome for a total of 25 miles
  • walk outside (or on treadmill if weather sucks) for a total of 21+ miles (or 3 5Ks, and one 10K)
  • Get Stronger – I recently purchased a book called “100 No-Equipment Workouts” and you guessed it, there are 100 different workouts. To get stronger, I will do a minimum of 12 NEWs (No-Equipment Workouts)
  • Food Journal – no calorie counting, no guilt, just a log of what I am eating. It is time to seriously find out how my belly reacts to foods and to also figure out what is going on with my itchies and my gremlin.
  • 10K Steps per day. I am human and while I want to get to 10K every day, life does happen. These goals are not about perfection. These goals are about progress so I am aiming for 21/28 days with 10K steps.
  • Enbrace #wycwyc – let go of guilt and let go of perfection. Add in movement where and when I can. Bring down my kettlebell. Add in pushups, squats, pullups, planks, bridges, KB swings whenever possible. I want to make #wycwyc a habit…a random habit, but a habit nonetheless.
  • Blog ~ I think 8 blog posts in 28 days is a reasonable goal.
  • Do one active activity each weekend day. This active activity does not need to be exercise for exercise sake (but that would count) but activity for the sake of getting off my ass and doing something, anything!
  • Practice my new ukulele. My daughter gifted me a ukulele for my birthday and I want to learn to play the dern thing.
  • LOOP GOAL – I wear my loop every day but I don’t hit goal nearly enough. I am aiming for 14/28 days at GOAL.
  • Each of the above bullets correspond with a point earned towards my big Rummy points goal.

So there are some goals for the next 28 days. I need to get off my tushy, stop typing and go get moving! It’s time for some walking!!

I will walk 500 miles


Go ahead and sing it with me. But I will walk 500 miles And I will walk 500 more… Ha. Now try getting that out of your head. image I have never set a mileage goal. Even when I was training for half marathons. Even when I jumped the gun and foolishly said I was ready to train for a marathon. I began consistently walking again after I answered the call for bloggers by JostRunning. What a push they gave me!! In December I began walking on any day I felt well enough to walk. Most of walks were in my living room following along with Leslie Sansone and her Walk at Home videos. December can be cold and I’ve been sick, staying inside has been smart. It was during this time, I rediscovered my love of walking and Walk at Home videos. Way back when my Q was a wee little babe, I discovered a Leslie Sansone Walk Away the Pounds VHS tape at a yard sale. YEP, a VHS tape and I needed to use a VCR. When I first saw the Leslie videos, I thought it was going to be hokey.  I mean come on, walking inside, how is that even possible?!? I was instantly surprised! It was kinda hokey but it was fun and I worked up a sweat! I had a nasty break up with my ex and I forgot all about Leslie Sansone until a few years later when I started back in college. I went back to my videos but never found the time, energy or combination of the two, during my college years. I guess having a baby, a full time job and a full load of classes, left little time for exercise. Fast forward to now. My Q is 14, no longer a baby. I am the teacher, no longer the student. But I am back to walking and following along with Leslie. My “Leslie walks” as I like to call them. This year I am making walking a priority. I like walking, inside and outside, and walking has so many physical and mental benefits. My mind and body will thank me for making walking a priority. My goal for the year is challenging and doable. I will walk 500 miles this year! I am already off to a great start. After a rocky start (still was fighting that funky sickness), I have managed to log 33.3 miles so far this month. I am aiming for 18 more to round at the month. I committed to walking the equivalent of a 5K and a 10K and a half marathon and a full marathon or 48.6 miles. This number gives me a great experience with/for JostRunning and puts a great dent into my yearly goal! I may not have set huge new year’s resolutions but I certainly have a great goal for my physical and mental well-being! Anyone else walking lots of  miles this year!

The secret sauce (aka my new plan)


Earlier this month, I reached out to a friend. You see, my friend Josie, aka YumYucky is absolutely amazing for so many reasons, including have stomachs, greedy children, and is an at-home workout killer. Those at-home workouts Josie kills is why I reached out. I knew I was still sick when I reached out but I also knew after being sick with coughing, sneezing, wheezing and everything in between for 6ish weeks would leave my lungs trashed. I also knew/know I’m completely out of shape. I can thank my lack of movement in the last year and the year of my surgery and recovery. I went to Josie and asked her how she started and if she’d help me come up with a plan.
I am one lucky lady. Josie agreed quickly and came back to me with a “beta” test for a “game” and a side dose of accountability. The game is basically an individual game of earning points. Think weight watchers points without the food or subtraction. I get to decide how I earn points and how many points I’m looking to collect. I can decide on weekly points or daily and I can set and change the criteria for earning points when I see fit.

This week (and last) I could earn the following points:

  • yoga = 1 point
  • walking = 1 point
  • Eats = 1 point {right now, my only food concern is eating according to my doctor – so no berries, no tomatoes, no shellfish, and no peanuts}
  • water, 64oz = 1 point
  • Bed by 11pm (school days) = 1 point

Bonus points:

  • GOAL on my Loop = 1 point
  • Posting a Selfie = 1 point
  • Listening to my body (taking aday off from walking or taking a nap because my body needs it more) = 1 point

What the heck do these points mean?!?!

Well, to be honest. Nothing. Unless you are me! I like earning points! It is motivational to me. Josie checks in with me every few days or I just randomly Facebook message her with my points from the day before. Its a silly little game but it is helping me stay focused on building healthy habits and making ME my best and happiest self.

I have decided to play my game like Rummy 500. I will rack up my points until I hit 5600. At 500 I will reward myself with something small. I am not good at rewarding myself. This is mainly because my budget it super tight. And with it being winter, my husband is not working at all.  (My budget issues/stress/guilt needs to be another post).

So for my first reward, I have decided when I get to 500 points earned I am going to treat myself to a pedicure.

I have been earning points for a little over a week and I LOVE it!! What do you think of my Josie’s game??




In early December I answered a call for bloggers from the wonderful ladies at JostRunning (I will call them JR or Jost from here out). The Jost ladies were looking for bloggers to run or walk and promote their virtual races. I applied in a whim, as you know I haven’t been my most active. This seemed like a great opportunity to get myself moving again.
If you areas my last blog post, you know December was rough for me. I had a chest cold for weeks. As chest cold was winding down, I got hives and a head cold. Oh yeah, I start the new year feeling like death.
But, back up a bit. December 17th o received my race number and on the19th I started walking. At home, in my living room with a Leslie Sansone gentle walk DVD. I went outside also, but I was slow and steady. Still sick but still walking. It wasn’t pretty and it wasn’t fast but I logged some miles in the last weeks of December.
Thru fitfluential I met a new friend who lives only one town over. We met for a walk in the woods and logged 3.28 miles in one session. Walking and talking are two of my favorite activities and its even better when I can combine the two! Plus, meeting a new friend makes for an even better walk! Thanks Angela!!


I’d like to say I knocked it out of the park. I did not. I set out to walk 22.4 miles to complete my December Jost goal. I only completed 14.42 miles. I’m calling this a win. I walked 14.42 miles than I did the months before. To be honest, the last time I logged any real miles it was October.


Just check out this race bling. Beautiful. Ribbons with the dates. and a handwritten note sent with each medal. Classy and awesome.

JostRunning has given me something more than just a chance to blog about virtual races they have given me a chance to come back to walking. Maybe one day I will run again but for now, I have my walking and I have virtual races and I have a new goal.
Walking is a fantastic exercise. Way back before I had knee and ankle surgery and before I was training for half marathons, I was a walker. I walked everywhere in my Birkenstocks because they were the only shoe that didn’t hurt my feet. I also walked at home using Leslie Sansone dvds. I loved it. I could walk in my little room I shared with Q in my grandparents’ house. Obviously this was before I met Big Man. I may have gotten busy with life and new and flashier exercises but I’m back to what was good to me. Good for me.
Virtual Racing
I’ve done two virtual races before but neither were quite like JostRunning. Most virtual races are random….for a quick fundraiser or holiday. Jost has races every month. In December there were 5 races to choose from. In January there are different options for each week.

I’m still working on consistency so I am going to ad up all the races and get a total number of 48.6 miles for the month. I’m ready to earn some medals.
New Goal
Because of the walking I did the last part of December, I decided to set a yearly walking goal. 500 miles in 2014. This is a pretty big goal for me but I really think its doable, challenging yet doable.

Its January and I’m ready to set to my January walking goals with Jost. Will you join me?!?

disclaimer: JostRunning has asked me to blog about my experiences participating in their virtual races. I will always blog my thoughts and exactly what happens….as can be seen by 14.42 miles as opposed to 22.4. I will always be honest and all opinions are totally mine.

Too much thinking


Between here and there, jennifer, the only thing that matters is what you think, from now ’til then.

Choices, choices, choices –
    The Universe

I think the universe has been trying to tell me something….like….”hey dummy, you think too much. Knock it off. Go DO something. Anything.”
Actually, it might be that tiny voice inside me that has been calling me a dummy.

I have been stuck in a battle of over-analysis paralysis.
I have doing way too much thinking and very little doing.
Just when I had wrapped my head around just getting up and doing, I caught one nasty little cold bug. Instead of taking a few days off from school when I first felt sick, I worked harder. There was so much to do. I went to school every day for two weeks wishing I had stayed home in bed. I was tired and sick and getting sicker. It was just a cold. Who takes time off for a little sniffle?!?
Because my classes couldn’t go on without me. Because I has so much work to do. Because it takes so much extra effort to plan for a day out of school. Yep, who do I think I am?!?
So I fought through a chest cold that continued to get worse while I went to school. After almost two weeks of fighting it, I took two days off school. The week before Winter Break is notoriously crazy at school and I did not want a substitute in my class. But I rested.
Three weeks into this sickness and I might just finally be getting better. I’m not 100% but I’m well enough to want to be better and to want to do things.
Being sick has humbled me. The steps at school take my breath away. Doing anything…and I mean anything, even washing a sink of dishes, left me exhausted. After a full day at school I required a nap. Preparing for Christmas was a slow process but luckily Winter Break started early enough to let me be slow.
I’ve enjoyed the holidays with my family and friends I consider family. I survived all the cooking, eating, drinking, and cleaning. I’ve rested and recovered to a point I’m ready to start moving.
I’m more than ready to move on from being sick. Of course, my chest may have other ideas. My chest still has that tight feeling where too much movement makes it hard to breathe.
Coming back from being sick….
Coming back from gaining almost all/all of the weight I had lost….
Coming back to my blog and putting it all out there again….

Is a very humbling experience.
I feel as though I am back at the beginning. Physically, I am at the same point when I started this journey to weight loss. Mentally, I’ve had my ups and downs but i feel strong and smart. I’m ready to go back and starts from square one. However, I do get to start with the knowledge I have gained over the last few years. I just have to start at the beginning AND keep all that knowledge working.

To stay strong I need:
*to do what is fun
*to start small and build
*to not compare what I am doing and the progress I am making with what anyone else is doing!
*to be honest with myself
*blog a few times a week…this is my journal and I need to remember to use it as just that.
*have fun and move every day!

The time for too much thinking is coming to a close.
OK, a zebra can’t change its stripes and I know I will over think but as long as I keep moving it will all be OK!