taking care of me

August has already been quite the eventful month. I decided to look into a part time job. If you are counting, this makes 3 outside of the house jobs.

• teaching
• cleaning, tourist changeovers
• server, Applebee’s

And don’t forget:

• mom to human child
• mom to furbabies
• wife
• band booster secretary
• band mom
• and I am sure I am missing some…

I have set out to start taking better care of Jen, (no, I will not be speaking any further in the 3rd person….it s just plain weird)

I have walked every day since July 7th. This is a HUGE accomplishment for me. I did not set out to walk every day for 30+ days. But once I hit day 16 or so, I felt like I could do anything!! And, I figured I could set a goal of continuing the streak until I started back in school September 2nd. At first I kept this goal a secret. I didn’t want to jinx myself. I kept going. Adding one day at a time.

To make this goal a reality, I am having to change the way I speak to myself and out loud. I talk about wanting to get my walk in and not how I “need” to walk. I want to continue my walking streak and as long as I think about it as something I want to do then I will keep on keepin’ on. Some days are hard, not gonna lie. I tell myself to just start moving. I can walk one mile no matter what!!

Two weeks ago, my Q and I started the PiYo program. We set out with the intentions to follow the program exactly the way it is written out on the calendar which was provided. Week one we rocked. Week two took a few twists. Taking on a new job where I am on my feet the whole time changed my thoughts on working out just a bit. I want to do every piyo workout. More importantly, I want to do every piyo workout without injury. That means I must listen to my body and not that tiny voice of guilt from not doing it. Last week, I took one rest day and then doubled up the next day and that was great!! The day I doubled up, I felt strong and ready to tackle it all. The day before when I chose a rest, I was tired and my legs felt tired and heavy.

And then there was Sunday. On Sundays I clean in the mornings but this Sunday, I also was scheduled for a training shift at AppleBee’s (AB) from 5-10pm. Did I mention this was all the night before Q started band camp?!? In between cleaning and showering for AB, I walked one mile in my bedroom. I took that walk low and slow…I use my Leslie Sansone videos but to keep it low, I don’t use the normal intensity. I keep the kicks and knees lower. I wanted to walk to keep my streak alive but I knew I would be on my feet for 5 hours. Keeping it low allowed me to walk and to stretch my legs a bit.

I am learning I can walk every day. I can do the PiYo workouts. I can work a physical job. I can do it all. I think walking every day has been good for me. I am successful in  this goal and I am starting to feel my legs responding. PiYo is hard for me but I modify and I do my best and I cannot wait to see what 8 weeks of this looks and feels like. I am looking forward to the physical changes, I am already noticing the mental benefits of both of my fitness endeavors.

I have walked late at night to get it in. I walked last night at 9:30. It is a wonderful benefit of walk at home workouts….I don’t have to worry about heat, humidity, rain, bugs, dark, etc. Even on the days I have walked late, I have felt like such a rockstar for getting in my walk. I feel like I am doing this great thing for my body. I am now realizing, it is not just my body that is happy for my daily walks!!

My new fitness endeavors are new ways to take care of me!

WOW!

 

I like pi….yo

I splurged a bit and bought myself a new workout program.

PiYo.  (click on the word for more information) Pilates, Yoga intensified but still low impact. Watch this video for a quick visual on what is PiYo.

My facebook feed is filled with BeachBody coaches and I have been seeing PiYo craziness for a couple of months. I watched videos, and read status updates of wow. I finally jumped on the bandwagon. One of my bloggy/twitter/facebook friends is a beachbody coach and since I have known her the longest, I asked her like a million questions. Nanci made me feel very comfortable about giving this program a try.

I ordered the program and tried to put it out my head until it arrived.

And then it arrived. And I saw the calendar. There are 3 DVDs with (I think) 8 different workouts. They provide you with an 8-week schedule. Six days a week. I must admit, I was a bit intimidated looking at 8 weeks all scheduled out on a calendar.

I showed my Q the trailer video on youtube and the calendar. She decided to workout and do this program with me. For real, she even cleaned her room to make enough space for us to PiYo. AND, we finished week 1, started week 2 and her room is still clean-ish.

Do you have any idea what an absolute humbling experience it is to workout with a fifteen year old?!?

My Q is a typical teenager. She spends way too much time on her bed watching, facebooking, or reading. More often than not, she is reading and this mama who also happens to be an English teacher almost never interrupts her family when they are reading. Q, however, takes after her mama and devours books. She hates to put the book (or iPad) down until she is done.

I am out of shape and getting back to my groove. I struggle through the workouts. And yes, they are around 20-40 minutes and I die. I sweat. I huff, I puff. I curse Chalene Johnson with her perkiness and perfect blond hair. Q just rolls through and she hardly sweats. The day after our workouts, I am tired and Q not so much.

Humbling!

I made a hashtag #meandmyQ – even when she frustrates me with her lack of sweat, I absolutely love working out with her. I am so brutally honest when we workout. “This sucks” “ooh, I like this one” “B***ch” “This lady is crazy” “She wants me to do what” “My belly gets in the way, I have to adjust this pose”  I have worked out without a shirt on, just in a sports bra. I fall over because my balance sort of totally sucks.

Yet, I keep pushing on. I have given up and walked away from too many “hard” things but I have also pushed through serious “hard” things. PiYo is hard but fun. Every time I do a workout, I am surprised when we get to the last five minutes. It sneaks up on me. So far, that last five minutes has caught me off guard every single time.

Working out with Q is pretty awesome. We have a calendar to know what to do on what day, but more than that we have to be accountable to each other. I can’t bluff her with excuses. And even when I am so not in the mood for working out or my joints are achy and I just want to be lazy, I don’t want to give my Q any of those excuses.

Who knew this was all going to happen when I decided to try something new?!?

The lessons in a cold

I’m scared to even think I might be on the road to recovery. I have been sick forever. Alright, not literally forever but its been mostly since Thanksgiving.
The night before Thanksgiving I was a tad sneezy but I completely blew that off and rocked the night away at an Elton John concert. The holiday weekend was a blur of activity, including the hugely important event of the Q-ster’s first day of work. At some point during this weekend I remember feeling rundown. I knew a cold was coming on but I was being stubborn. I was not getting sick.
Sniffles to a full blown cold to upper respiratory infection to a hivey breakout to head cold to upper respiratory infection.
That was the basic rundown of my sickness since Thanksgiving. I had to stop and write it out to believe myself how long I’ve been sick. This post is not to complain and whine about being sick. Well, not really. I was in a bit of denial about how long I’d been sick or just how sick. It seems to be easier to see it now that I am starting to come out of it.
Being sick sucks!!
But I learned a few things….
I ❤ naps!
I was stubborn and I didn’t rest enough when I first noticed I was rundown. But I’ve learned my lesson on rest. I’ve been wearing my Loop, which monitors my sleep along with tracking my steps, calories and activity. I plug my Loop bracelet into my computer and it uploads my info into an online program. Today I went peeking at my sleep numbers.
WHOA!!
I’ve been in the 1-4 hour range almost every day in the last 4 weeks. NOT even close to enough sleep to heal a sick body. Since I’ve been sick, I really like knowing how much or little sleep I am actually getting each night. I never thought about the amount of sleep I actually get. I only focused on getting to bed by 11 on school nights so when the alarm rings at 6:15 I can bounce out of bed. Or so the theory goes. HA!
I missed a few day of school but went back on Wednesday. On Wednesday I walked into my house after school and made a beeline to my bed. I napped for over and hour and a half. I love naps!! I will continue to nap and catch up on all the missed sleep.
There is only one goal!!!
On new year’s eve eve I broke out in hives. This was the second time in two months I was all broken out and itchy on my neck. The last time I got so fed up, I chopped off 16 inches of hair. It was drastic but itching was only part of the reason my hair went and that’s another story and probably not very blog worthy. Anyway, I broke out in hives and went to see my doctor. Talking with him made me realize I had been itchy for longer than I could remember and at times and in places it had been really bad. Doc is convinced its a food allergy. I am now 9 days into a doctor ordered 30-day elimination of tomatoes, berries, peanuts, and shellfish. Doc also prescribed an antihistamine, an acid reducer, and a steroid. Fun.
The day after I started all the meds, I woke up with a head full of snot. Sorry for the image but that’s what it felt like. I suffered for a few days before I got more meds from doc. And I stayed home from school for two days. When I went back, I napped after school.
After six-ish weeks of sickness my lungs are trashed. My already out of shape body feels even weaker and more out of shape.
My one and only goal….to heal my body.
Healing my body will be a slow process. Six weeks of chest and head colds have left my lungs pretty trashed. I still have a cough and a wheeze and walking up the stairs at school is enough to take my breath away. I have some allergy that makes me itchy all over with occasional breakouts in hives. I still have my stomach gremlin causing me pains and issues. I still have a knee and ankle that need attention, even two years after surgery.Those are three rather big “problems” that need to be addressed. I need to pay attention to my body, listen to it and do right by it. I will add in slow movement when and how I can. Yesterday was a very active day. According to my Loop, I hit 10k steps and my activity goal. I didn’t even “exercise” yesterday. I woke up and felt good so I started the day with a round of sun salutation and meditation. At school, I feel good enough to walk around during all my classes. Those little things added up and just before bed I was super close to hitting goal on my Loop. I marched around my house and did a few squats to get to goal.

The lessons I’ve learned being sick….
1. Rest is a wonderful splendor. Naps are not for children and I over much need them! Sleep will help the healing process.
2. Listening to my body. My body know exactly what it needs (slow movements, nutritious foods, kindness and love) and my only job, my only goal, is to give my body what it wants and needs.
3. I’m embracing #wycwyc and #rethinkyourday because those little movements and small changes add up to healthy habits.

I hope all my friends have fared better this winter than I have.
Xo

today, tomorrow, and beyond

Life is full of Starts and Stops.

MY life is extremely full of starting and stopping and starting over.

My journey to find my happy and healthy “place.” You know that place where IT just happens and I am not stressing how to make it happen, yeah, that place. I have been struggling to find this place for a very long time and it has gotten to be even more of a struggle in the past few months.

I should be so much farther along in my weight loss.

I should be so much stronger.

I should be so much more consistent with  my exercising.

I should be happy.

I should be…

Wait.

Wait just a damn minute.

I am happy. Ok, life isn’t perfect, but what exactly does perfect look like. Yeah, we struggle to make ends meet. Yeah, we have to keep our “date nights” to a minimum and we haven’t had a vacation in years. But I have an awesome husband. And an awesome kid (ok, I am not living in a fairy tale here but she is a good kid). I have a great job (mentally exhausting at times) and a great family.  Do we struggle? Hell yeah! Are we perfect? Hell No!

Do we love??

Absofreakinglutely!!

 

And this is ALL that matters!!

 

#truth – I started this post earlier on Saturday, then put it to the backburner and I went about and enjoyed my weekend. Then I came bacn and re-read all I had written. There are a bunch of “shoulds” up there. And I realized…FUCK the shoulds and the shouldofs.  I don’t need or want to live with regrets, they are not healthy and I don’t like the guilt that comes with them!

So I am done with the starts and stops. My life does not and should not be measured by the pounds lost or gained. I am not defined by the number of gym visits I make each week. I am over feeling guilty for a bad day of eating or a missed day at the gym.

Today is a new day.

Tomorrow is a new day.

Every day is a chance to be a little bit better than the day before.

I am going back to what makes me feel good.  I packed a bag for the gym and instead of making lofty goals, I am simply going to the gym. I am going to hop on the elliptical and get my groove back.

today.

tomorrow.

and beyond.