I have a secret. A BIG secret. I am not ready to announce but know it is something on my mind almost all the time right now. Just know that I am working on something pretty big. I won’t keep you in suspense for too long…mainly because I am terrible at keeping secrets.
For now I am going to keep this one under wraps.
Last week, I blogged that I was ready to start working on losing weight. I was ready to start taking control. I have been logging my food over at myfitnesspal.com since October 1. Until this weekend, I only had one friend on this site. Until last week, I didn’t want eyes on what I was doing. I didn’t want anyone to witness my failures or my lack of real effort. I kept this hidden. I tend to do this as an out. No one knows, so I can make excuses or no progress….blah…this is terrible thinking.
I am learning I need to reach out to the right people.I need to reach out in ways that are beneficial to me and my journey. And I realize, I need to this at my own pace and I need to make the mistakes so I can learn and move on!
I have learned….I need support and encouragement and to be called out when I deserve it. I am mendingjen on myfitnesspal.com and I would love for you to add me!
I want to be accountable. Even if you never look to see if I am logging over there, just knowing you are there.
I have been doing a great job at logging my food…in fact, including today, I am 26 of 28 days! This is huge for me…I have been awful about logging my food. Usually, I have a lousy food day and I don’t want to log it and that turns into days of not logging. This time, I am determined to keep this log. It is not about being guilty about what I am eating or being guilty about the number of calories consumed. I am logging everything I eat and paying attention to how my body reacts. Right now, spicy foods are a big no-no as I have been having gastric pain. I do better with little to no wheat in my life – my belly thanks me!
I have been tracking but not losing weight. This week, I am hoping I made some strides towards changing that. Tomorrow is my official weigh in day but I have already peeked at the scale. I can’t help it, I think the more I see the scale the less it bothers me.
As much as I want to lose weight, I want more to find the healthy habits that work best for me. I don’t want to eat a certain way to lose weight then gain it all back when I go back to “normal” eating. I want to redefine my normal.
I need to blog more of this journey. I should be getting my thoughts out of my head and out in the universe more often. Blogging really does help me stay focused and accountable. Plus, I need more structured time in my day. When I have free time, I tend to get lazy. I don’t know why but I recognize it.
I have to be better about getting my physical activity in. I feel better when I am active. I eat better and I sleep better when I am active. But, deep down, I am lazy. I know this. I fight this. Again, this is where I am better with my activities planned out. I miss having a training plan to follow.
This has been an eye-opening week.
Whatever the scale says tomorrow.
I had a fantastically, productive week.
I will be back to tell you all about how I prepared for Hurricane Sandy!